Self knowledge

In my previous post I talked about finding your authentic self in this social media generation. link

The key to finding your authentic self is to know yourself. Self knowledge I believe is the greatest achievement in life. It’s a tragedy to age  without getting to know yourself better. The earlier you get to know who you are, what you are good at and where you want to go the better your life will turn out. So before you invest your time on anyone or anything invest in you so that you get a sense of who you are and what you want in life. Once you figure that out life gets much easier. It’s never too late to start this process of getting to know yourself better but if you can why not start early. You don’t want to get old with no sense of who you are and what you want in life.

When you know who you are, what you want from life and where you are headed the things that used to hurt You, offend you or bother you all become irrelevant because you realize that you don’t have that amount of time and energy to waste on the minimal concerns. You start getting clearer picture of life that once was too blur.

I have been trying to find my authentic self and trust me that is quite a work. The more I am getting to know myself the more I am realizing that I have so much more to learn about myself. I was under the impression that I had pretty good understanding of who I am but lo and behold when the reality of how much I know myself hit me I had to agree that I was wrong.

Let me put forward this disclaimer that I don’t have it all figured out and I will keeping learning till I die. It is a constant journey. I am constantly trying to figure what is right and what’s not, what works for me and what does not or who I am and who I am not. I also try and make sure that I am taking good care of myself without hurting others. I am learning how to live and express my life in a way that is authentic to me. I have evolved as a person and there are many lessons I have learned on this journey of self discovery that if I try and start writing about I wont be able to finish this post. But I would like to mention the key quality I have come to recognize in myself.  I am and have always been a fighter.

Let me give you a glimpse of how I try to spent more time with myself and what I am learning in the process.

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Life does get hectic at times but I always try to find time in the mornings and evenings for myself. I wake by 5 a.m and take a walk out in the nature by myself. In the evening I do the same for at least 45 minutes. I also make sure to shut down all electronic devices for at least an hour or two in a day and be with myself. I work really hard when I am at office but I  forget about work until I get back to the office next morning. These small rituals have helped me to not be overwhelmed by everything going around but become more self aware and be at peace. I don’t always have the best days but most nights I go to bed with peace of mind.

My life has never, is not and will never be easy but I have always been a fighter. I remember even as a child I could never tolerate injustice being done to anyone and I would fight for anyone who seemed to be victimized . As a child I obviously did not have good understanding of just and unjust but whatever my little brain could understand as unjust I did fight for. I am not someone who gives into the difficulties of life. Anytime life has hit me on the face I did not just give up but did face and fought the challenges . I never want the challenges that come across my way to return back feeling victorious. I totally believe if God let those challenges fall on my path then He definitely knows that I am capable to face them and I would never want to just give in.

I don’t want to sound like I am a very tough person. I do believe in being vulnerable. I cry over even a movie and I am a total drama queen at times but I sure am a fighter too. I may not be the strongest in the arena but I don’t want be a coward. When I stand in the arena with my challenges I am going fight back and at least give a tough fight even though I am not always going to win. I sure am going to lose and fail but I don’t want to shy away from the challenges. I do feel lost, broken and sad but I never want to let those feelings keep me from showing up to life.I have also learned that I need a healthy balance of being tough and vulnerable. I am not necessarily going to open up and announce all my secrets and fears to the world but there is a sense of relief and freedom in being vulnerable.

I am an optimist person but I don’t want to put on the mask of perfection and act as if my life is all in perfect alignment. I constantly make mistakes and say wrong things but I have learned that living a good life is not about being perfect or having it all together. Good life is having the courage to go through life in the midst of the challenges and giving myself the permission to be vulnerable and make mistakes. I don’t always make the right decision, I don’t always treat people the right way and I keep failing but these are also the things that keep me grounded and reminds me that I have no reason to take pride in being better than anyone.

 

Getting to know myself is a constant battle and one of the biggest challenges. However, I don’t let the challenges scare me but try to hear what they have to say to me. Every challenge brings in some opportunities and lesson if we listen carefully.

So this is a glimpse of my story of getting to know myself. How much do you know yourself? How prepared are you to face the challenges life may throw at you at any instant? If you do not know yourself and if you are not prepared for life to happen you may end up complaining,  getting frustrated and maybe even murdering yourself. So take time getting to know yourself it’s totally worth it. And please remember you are in the making and that’s a beautiful thing.

In the making,

Tshering.

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